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Writer's pictureKimley Dunlap-Slaughter

Are You God-Centered or Self-Centered? Day 3:


Another sign you may be self-centered is when you have no room for God or other spiritual relationships. As Christians, we are given the gift of God's grace through His Son, Jesus Christ. We receive this gift when we repent of our self-centered ways and trust in Christ alone. In the noise that is "Christianity" - if you take the time to really listen - you will often hear a false gospel that appeals to the self-centered, individualistic nature of human beings. Some people may have very busy schedules, which isn’t necessarily an indicator of selfishness. It’s important to look deeper and understand your heart, like why you’re busy and what you do when you do have time. There’s only one thing you can put at the center of your life that will never change and is strong enough to sustain you through life: Jesus Christ. This sin of self-centered, self-willed, rebellion against God-centered living was put upon the Messiah as prophesied by Isaiah. When your core is solid in God, you also have bounce-ability. You bounce back from stress faster. You bounce back from problems faster. You bounce back from grief faster. You bounce back from a crisis faster. You have something solid in your life that doesn’t change, and you worry less. They are intolerant of differences. They devalue others and put them in a lesser position. They lack the ability to feel confidence internally, and instead find a sensation of superiority by seeing others as inferior. In addition, they can't see different viewpoints. They usually have points of views that are fixated and most of the time not valid, since they are usually the type who only reads the cover of the magazine to look smart, and then is opinionated about it. They may also harshly criticize others who don't buy into their views. "Let no one deceive himself. If anyone among you seems to be wise in this age, let him become a fool that he may become wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their own craftiness”; and again, “The Lord knows the thoughts of the wise, that they are futile" 1 Corinthians 3:18-20 (NKJV).


In the end, try to not hate self-centered people. Have a rationally based compassion for them since they usually have had a past that created a wrong type of self-protection mode for them. There is a part of them that they don't like and are trying hard to cover. While many people have had pasts that are not perfect, nor close to it, self-centered people are lacking the skills to address these issues in a productive way to be able to truly connect. Instead of facing their past truthfully, they are hiding it. And remember, what you deny and repress controls you and what you bring out and acknowledge, you can be in control of. At the end, remember that you can have compassion for someone, but at the same time hold them accountable for their actions and have clear self-boundaries. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths" Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV).

One way to know you are self-centered is when you refuse to trust God more than yourself. This scripture makes it clear that God doesn’t want us to lean on our own understanding or our own perspectives. He wants us to trust him and realize that we can’t figure out everything on our own. It takes humility to admit that only God truly knows everything. Thinking we know better than God is a sign our lives are centered around our own ego, emotions, and opinions rather than centered around God. It is in these moments that we have to explore our hearts and be honest with God about why we struggle to trust him. "A fool has no delight in understanding, But in expressing his own heart" Proverbs 18:2 (NKJV).



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