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The Purpose For Forgiving and Forgetting – Part 1: “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” Matthew 6:14–15 (NKJV).
a. The Bible talks a lot about forgiveness because it was God who first forgave us. While forgiveness is difficult, you must learn that forgiveness gives you so much freedom to live your life freely on purpose. However, Jesus also offers direct teachings on forgiveness, and while his words are sometimes contradictory, it is clear that interpersonal forgiveness is an important concern. While he does instruct his disciples to forgive "70 times seven times" in the Gospel of Matthew. Forgiveness does not erase the past but looks upon it with compassion. Yet, to withhold forgiveness keeps alive emotions of hurt, anger, and blame which will tarnish your perception of life. In all four Gospels, Jesus notes the importance of forgiving others to ensure God's forgiveness. To forgive, avoid ruminating on thoughts of being wronged, rather, trust the power of forgiveness to heal the hurt and pain. Keep in mind by holding on to pain and resentment, you suffer because the sorrow is intensified to keep it alive. "Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven" Matthew 18:21-22 (NKJV).
b. Forgiveness means to let go of hatred, instead of allowing it to eat at you. We have all been in situations where we have done wrong and desire forgiveness: from a spouse, family member, friend, neighbors or even a co-worker. Sometimes the person we most need forgiveness from is ourselves. You must never forget that forgiveness liberates the soul while it removes fear, and that is why it is such a powerful weapon to free one from the hurtful and painful memories of the past, so that they can look to the future. Remarkably, there’s a close link between negative emotions and illness, documented over the past decade by several leading doctors. Toxic and destructive emotions have the potential to activate certain diseases if we don’t attend to our emotional wellbeing. To forgive, avoid ruminating on thoughts of being wronged. Rather, trust the power of forgiveness to heal the hurt and pain. “Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all sins” Proverbs 10:12 (NKJV).
c. Despite people’s perceptions that forgiveness means to forget, its motive is preserved in self-forgiveness and the role you played in co–creating the circumstances. And then there are the times when someone is asking us for forgiveness, and we must look deeply in ourselves to offer it, no strings attached; it's hard and many times complicated to the flesh. By holding on to pain and resentment, you suffer because the sorrow is intensified to keep it alive. Forgiveness is a loaded word. It's been tossed around self-help circles for years, but little has been made of what the science behind forgiveness can teach us about our own lives. Forgiveness is not saying what happened was ok. Forgiveness is not saying you accept the person who wronged you. Instead, forgiveness is choosing to accept what happened as it happened rather than what could or should have happened. Remember, unforgiveness will keep you a prisoner to the enemy as well as your past pains. “He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates friends” Proverbs 17:9 (NKJV).
d. Forgiveness is like painting over the past hurt and painful memories that brought you to a place of anger, heartache, resentment and unforgiveness. It's time growing spiritually, so that you can move effectively in your purpose for the Kingdom of God. However, it is difficult to forgive a perpetrator for wrongdoing and it goes against our moral code. Yet, if you consider it from a greater perspective, forgiveness is associated with your emotional welfare, not merely granting the other person pardon. At the end of the day, forgiveness is not for the other person’s benefit at all; it’s for our own. Forgiveness can mean that you let go. Forgiveness can mean you love from a distance. Forgiveness can mean you step into your present rather than anchoring in the past. Regardless of how illogical it may seem at times, it is through unconditional forgiveness that we surrender the past to the past and enter the present, freeing ourselves to stand in the everlasting light with Christ. “Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven” Luke 6:37 (NKJV).
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